Crabby Thoughts

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I was at a grocery store today and I noticed three large words on the side of the building. Relax. Renew. Revive.

My whole family is sick. Patrick who never gets sick, is sick. I am the only one in the house without a hacking cough. Lucas has been coughing in my face all night long for the last few nights and I am silently hoping I stay the only one without a cough. I would love to tell you how gracefully I have been handling the wide awake nights but I am not one to lie. So the truth is I am about as crabby as it gets.

So as I walked past 5 smokers, one lady wearing an entire bottle of perfume, 2 kids asking me for money to donate to something and into the store I wasn't exactly feeling the message posted on the building. I was crabby, really crabby. I went in to buy the orange juice that Patrick requested (he is withering away with no appetite) and the store was packed. People everywhere. I had a moment where I wanted to communicate my crabbiness to all of them, but I kept moving through the store uttering nasty words to the person who wrote those calming words outside.

I paid for my orange juice and went past the kids asking for money, the many smokers and into my car. Driving away I felt so grateful to be in my car. I felt so grateful to have orange juice to bring back to Patrick. For a moment in my crabbiness I thought about those three words. Words I believe in.

Relax. Renew. Revive.

They aren't in a place, although a retreat with others making me dark greens with no children makes it easier to find. They are a state of mind. I can relax as I move through my daily routine and I can seek out ways to renew and to revive. In those few moments alone in the car, I found some gratitude and a moment of relax.

I'm back to crabby now. Still wanted to share this with you.

My 15 cleansers and I are on day 1 of 10 days and this is my favorite way to eat broccoli.

Sesame Broccoli In The Raw

3 cups of broccoli florets 2 Tb olive oil 1 Tb wheat free tamari soy sauce 1 Tb raw honey juice of 1 lemon 1 Tb tahini

1- tsp sesame seeds (optional)

Mix all the sauce ingredients together and pour onto the broccoli. Pour onto the broccoli and mix well. Top with sesame seeds.

Cleanse Excitement

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My beautiful friend Jill and I are cleansing and we thought it would be fun to share the experience with all of you.

I've had some insomnia recently and have turned to chocolate more often than I would like to admit to deal with a pile of stress (or is it the other way around?). Jill has felt the change of the seasons calling her to eat, and eat and eat a little more. We can easily confuse our need for more hearty and sweeter foods (think squash and root vegetables) with processed sugary foods.

I always use a whole foods cleanse, no fancy products, no starvation and no stress. It's a simple planning process to make a list of meals and groceries. The idea is to buy less processed, eat more real foods and connect with the autumn season through winter squash, dark greens and other gorgeous fall foods.

For this cleanse I spontaneously sent out an e-mail to all of you that subscribe to my newsletter and gave two options to join us on the cleanse. If you don't get the newsletter, here is the link, we would love to have you join us. The e-mail cleanse group starts this weekend, so if you are feeling spontaneous, join us and take a step towards moving through the Holiday season without the bloat, irritability and dry skin. Remember, this isn't a diet, it is a connection to whole foods, to moving a bit slower, taking time for ourselves and honoring our bodies.

What does slowing down your body look like for you? What is one place you are feeling a need for a fresh start?

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You may notice the site is looking  a little different and I have been a bit quiet on posts the last week? My amazing colleagues at The Healthy Design are making all the last changes, so if things seem a little out of place, give us a few days to get it all worked out. I would love to hear your feedback!

Picture Thoughts

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For three days not knowing if my computer would come back to life, if the year of pictures would be recovered, if I would see bits of the last 2 years of my business again. In that time, allowing the idea of letting go--really letting go--to wash over me. I found calm in the idea of starting fresh.

I told Patrick that I couldn't find a way to feel happy with our living room. It always looked messy and torn apart.She says in all her knowing 8 years of life, "It looks like you live with three kids." There is wisdom in that girl.

When my mind needs to wander, feeling such gratitude for the calm staring at these creatures brings to me. Listening to a friend who is longing to become a mother feel unsure about her journey. Thinking of how much love she is already bringing this child who has yet to meet her.

Comparing himself to his sister, struggling with so much in this 5th year. And then one morning, this appears, and he smiles when I tell him I want to keep that one forever. Thank you Ed, he is making his world each day as he moves through the discomfort and joy.

Looking for little places to tuck cozy blankets...feeling so warm from the first day of turning the radiators on. Knowing after I pick them up from the floor and fold them for the 15th time I will be finding them a new place.

Loving cauliflower, grass-fed beef, carrots, parsnips, garlic and tomato puree. Watching the guy who never gets sick feel so lousy. Excited to be able to let him rest.

Wondering how many times I can hear the word why, and still find a way to answer it.

Knowing after some really hard months, that at some point all this tough stuff held the most amazing of gifts. A moment when I felt the resistance go, and then things started changing.As the resistance is melting away the allowing is flowing in. That feels good. It feels really good.

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Where do you feel you are resisting change in your life?

What's one gentle step you could take today to start allowing some of the feel good into your life?

Share a comment with us below. Forward this post to a friend who could use these questions. Spread it forward.

The Now

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Most of my writing these last few days has happened cuddled up in my husband's large sweatshirt. The candles on the table are lit almost every night and I sometimes pretend they are my wood stove (hmm, someday)! My toes are feeling a bit chilled; "the shift of the seasons is upon us" the bright red tree outside my window seems to say each time it blows in the wind.

Our dinners have involved stewing and roasting and quick stir-fries. Of course, soup is an autumn must in our house and so far is filling bellies with few complaints. The inspiration card sitting on my computer says, "I stay in the NOW and enjoy each and every moment."

As I was making a beautiful green soup for dinner the other night, I was in a mood. The one where you bang loudly as you prepare dinner and try not to talk because otherwise you might cry and then the soup would be far too salty. Oh, you know the mood? I knew the soup would take forever and the kids were starving so I made up some fast PB&J sandwiches, carrots and cucumbers and placed them before my hungry gaggle of kids. They relaxed. Eventually I was able to move through the mood and into completing the soup, lovingly, and talking out my feelings to my husband. (Re-read that, talking, not taking)!

The green broth later brought warmth and the soothing I needed. By moving my energy away from the angry soup making into just was needed, food for kids, space to talk to Patrick, I was able to move into the NOW. I may have felt sad, but opening up the NOW brought me back to the joy that I have. Removing myself from the past and from all expectation of soup or children or reaction was the shift I needed.

The card also says, "This is a new day, one that I have never lived before."

Where could you use the reminder of possibility and remembering the NOW?

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Green Root Vegetable Soup

olive oil 1/2 onion, diced 3 carrots, sliced into circles 3 parsnips, sliced into 1/2 moons 2 cloves garlic, smashed and finely diced 2 bone-in chicken breasts (if you aren't using chicken substitute vegetable broth for water and tofu for the chicken) cold water, enough to cover the chicken breasts 3 cups kale leaves, roughly chopped, kept in rather large chunks 2 tsp apple cider vinegar 1 tsp honey salt, pepper to taste

optional, fresh lemon juice to add before serving and hot sauce for a little depth

In large heavy soup pot, add oil, onion, carrot and parsnip. Saute for 5 minutes and add garlic. After 1 minute add the chicken, water, kale, vinegar, honey, salt and pepper. Bring to a boil, turn down to a simmer and cover for an hour and a half or until chicken is cooked through.

Remove chicken to a cutting board. Remove kale with tongs to a blender (you may need about 1/2 cup broth also). Allow to cool. Remove chicken from bones and add back to soup pot. Blend kale and return to soup pot.

Serve in a deep bowl with some salt and pepper to taste. As you sip the broth remember the NOW.

JM Sylist Guest

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Please join me today over on Jill Marinelli's site, JM Stylist for The Inside-Out Makeover.

One of the most amazing parts of my job is the women who I am lucky enough to work with. Jill and I are friends, colleagues and mother's who are rocking the business world. Please share your thoughts with us in the comment section about the connection you feel between the inside and outside.

Allowing Gentleness

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You know the hug that comes at the perfect moment of needing, when you are sad or lonely and touch is the solution? I've watched my husband walk over to Eli during a tantrum (Eli's tantrum!) and wrap his big arms around Eli's tiny body and a physical shift happens. The tantrum doesn't go away immediately, it changes into something else as he is being wrapped in gentleness.

Moments when I notice negativity lingering are during times I feel out of control. The house has become so messy I don't know where to start, I've been emotionally eating or the kids lack structure and guidance. Those are the times when we need to wrap our arms around ourselves and allow in some gentleness.

It might be a new skill set, being gentle to ourselves. I consider it part of my spiritual practice as it brings me closer to the person I love to be. When I'm allowing gentleness towards myself I notice the shift in my children, my creativity and my relationships. Words flow easier and the dirt and dog hair on the floor, well, they will always come back.

Shifting into our gentleness is a way of manifesting an incredible life. Before I gave up dieting I was so unkind to myself about my body, taking it through every diet known and telling it every day how unattractive it was. The shift into gentleness brought a calm and joy into my life that allowed me to look at others in a new way. It allowed me to find gratitude and passion, which is slightly contagious. Your life will start attracting that which you are glowing.

I asked the women in my group this week to think of one place where they could be more gentle to themselves. In their responses I can feel the shifts they are making in their own lives and the impact it is having on their family.

So I ask you, where is one place you could be more gentle to yourself? How will you wrap your arms around yourself?

Cabbage and Kale For Dinner

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Olive oil in the bottom of a hot skillet

Add about 4 cups shredded napa cabbage

2 cloves of garlic, chopped, into the skillet

4-5 shredded leaves of kale

For protein add 1 lb ground turkey or 2 cups of white beans

Quick addition of 2 Tb tamari, 2 Tb apple cider vinegar, 1/2 tsp fish sauce, 1 tsp honey or agave

If you have any herbs still growing in the garden 1/4 cup, cilantro, parsley or basil are best

To finish a little cayenne, some diced cucumber for a cooling crunch, mung bean sprouts would be great.

This meal can be eaten as is or over rice or noodles. It serves a big family on a budget with some left overs. For children who don't like cabbage (hmm) you can serve them the protein and cucumber and find some peace at the table.

Visionary Mom Guest

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Please join me today in a special place, in a space that is all about moving forward and living your dreams.

Lisa Work-Delzer shares her truth, passion and dreams while coaching you to do the same through Visionary Mom. I learned of Lisa through my mentor, friend and fellow mama, Erin Goodman, who inspires me through her blog, exhale.return to center. The internet has provided me the opportunity to connect with the most passionate amazing women and to spread my voice and message of joy and health to others. For that I am so grateful.

Lisa has asked mothers to share their truth. I spent many hours days writing this piece for Lisa as the words do not always flow quickly when talking intimately about truths. As we move through the fear of voicing them, we come that much closer to our dreams and move that much farther from where we feel stuck. Please share a comment on Lisa's blog, and spend some time on her site; I know you will feel at home there.

The Truth Is...

Family Dinners

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I have a vision of family dinner. It starts with a beautifully set table, moves onto bowls and platters of our favorite food in the center of the table, mixes in some laughter and stories while slowly enjoying each bite and ends with smiles as the kids clear their place and go happily off to play, while Patrick and I linger over a glass of wine.

The reality of family dinner is that I am lucky to get enough forks on the table each night before someone screams that they want water and don't like squash soup and the candles get blown out and cups spill onto the floor as the dog laps it up. (Breathe, just writing that made me a bit panicked!)

When Lucas was a baby I would feed the two older kids at a small table in the kitchen where they ate most of their meals. As Lucas grew he moved onto a high chair for most of his meals. Now that he is two (and wanting to do everything like Eeeee-yiiii - Eli), I am trying to combine my vision of family dinner, with the frantic reality and hopefully come out somewhere in between the two.

This starts with letting go of the tablecloth as it so much simpler to wipe a table than launder a cloth every day; and every day would be a must for the amount of spilling the independent two year old does. I have looked to ritual to ease us into the family table of five.

A cloth napkin, silverware and cup placed on the table by the kids before dinner. The adults later add a pitcher of water and the bowls or platters so we can eat family style. This can be risky when little people decide spaghetti squash is the best thing they have ever eaten and go in for seconds and thirds, I do it! We mostly drink out of small glass jars as they are hard to break, and I have some wooden plates for the kids.

A bit of seasonal beauty goes in a vase, ferns or roses or even weeds the kids pick on their walks. This allows the table to flow with the seasons. We have been borrowing this old table from our neighbor and are now on the hunt for a table that has history, that will fit our family and all those we hope to bring to our table through the years.

Celebrations, giggles, crumbs, spills, art, homework, projects, delicious food, elbows, napkins, computers, silverware...it all finds it's way to our table. At the end of the night, when it's all over (and hopefully cleaned up) that family dinner is part of what creates our family rhythm and keeps time in our house.

The candles still glow at times after the lights go out, and I find some breathing space. It's work to bring dinner to the family table, it's love, it's learning, it's allowing each individual to learn more about themselves. In the ritual of it all, as I sit typing this, Patrick is making homemade sauce to bring to the family table one night soon for dinner. I can imagine the table, the napkins, the Romano cheese, the salad in the loved wooden bowl. I hear the crabby voice of Eli who always melts down about 5 minutes before we sit down, Lucas sitting at the table spilling his water before the food ever arrives and Chloe trying to sneak bites of the Romano when no one is looking. And so is our family dinner.

Where do you find ritual in the family dinner?

Thoughts Over Lunch

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I sat with a bowl of arugula, sauted chick peas and goat cheese.

I thought about the calm that was around me.

I saw the toys scattered from the play date that morning, feeling happy Lucas had some time to be the big kid of the house.

I remembered the noise of all three of my children when they are home and thought of what I might do with them in the afternoon.

Patrick called and told me his heart space is when he is alone with me, snuggled up in the quiet.

I thought about how good it feels to be in that loved place with him.

I felt the spice in my mouth from the curry I added to the chick peas and I wanted to eat slowly so I could savor each bite.

I wondered how long Lucas would nap and if I would accomplish some of my work tasks.

I thought about my house, how we are stretching it at it's seams with our large family under it's small walls.

I tried to think of the love that is under these walls, not the size or the flaws it may have.

I thought about someday a new place, a home that allows us all to have some special space and to spread out a bit.

I wished for a little bit of change.

I remembered I hadn't had enough water and should have two glasses before going to pick the kids up.

I ate my last bite and felt warm inside, the curry was good.

I cried to Patrick this morning before he left for work.

He instantly made me feel calmer and understood.

I thought about time, I thought about now.

I thought about then.

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Where are your thoughts bringing you on this last day of September 2010?

Heart Space

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Recently I got sick, the sore throat, achy body sick. I am rarely sick anymore and this was a little reminder of that, and a clear signal that I had been going full speed without breathing space. I was also saying hello to my 36th year and wanted to spend that day on the beach. Thinking of the drive, carrying Lucas and actually having to pack a diaper was enough to make me stay home and feel sorry for myself. The intention to find some heart space at the beach was stronger than my achy-ness so off we went with a diaper, camera, kombucha and tings (that was as much nutrition as I could come up with for us).

We pulled into the parking lot, wind blowing wildly and Lucas was asleep. I wished I had brought a magazine or that there was a book in the car, a book other than Pooh Corner. I opened the kombucha and swallowed down some astragalus and sat still. Sat still. I questioned whether I would get out of the car or just sit still. I called Patrick who shares the day welcoming his next year.

The sound of the waves and the wild wind kept calling. I grabbed the bag, told Lucas we were at the beach and he gently woke up. The wind from Earl was so strong, the waves stunning as they collided into each other, over and over. Lucas and I played with the rocks and even left the beach with the salty water all over our pants.

This is where I find my heart space.

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Do you have a special place that brings you calm and order when life is shifting too quickly?

Shifting Seasons

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I have been reading about the shifting of seasons and how it affects our moods, our daily routines and how we feel about our bodies. I am missing the sun and yet this time of year I become more creative and thoughtful of what I wish to accomplish and the things that I hold as my goals or intentions. One of the things I am working to do is preserve some of the summer food to eat in the fall and winter. My family picked about 8 pounds of peaches and most were eaten or frozen, a crumble was made for the e-cookbook I am working on and I decided one day after school to make the kids some Peach Honey Sauce (they love applesauce) to put over vanilla coconut milk ice cream.

As I prepared the peaches and thought of the generations of women who grew and preserved their food, season after season, I noticed a shift take place inside. It wasn't a dramatic shift, and yet it felt as though I was returning to something that was always waiting for me. How many seasons have I planned to can or freeze and then let it go because of excuses or lack of motivation? This time, before the Harvest Moon shone down on us I had accomplished much of the preserving I had been dreaming of. Apples, tomatoes and peaches...three beautiful foods to begin with.

This shift I was experiencing was from a full filled intention that brought me to a deeper connection with my food, my family and the femaleness that so many of us run away from. That woman in the kitchen with an apron, kids running around peeling apples and sweating from the heat of the canning. I love that woman, I love being that woman. I love that my husband was in the kitchen with me, peeling tomatoes.

So I am shifting with the season, as the leaves turn, as I take on more projects and set higher intentions for myself. I think about finding some places of quiet and balance to stay connected to the rhythm fall brings, as it asks us to slow down just a bit.

We have a bowl of acorns mixed into our white pebbles and swirly shells from the beach. The seasons meeting. How is the Autumn Season inspiring you?

Just seven peaches make this warm sauce...

Peach Honey Sauce

7 peaches, skin and pit removed removed* 1 cup water 1/2 cup honey squeeze of lemon tiny pinch of salt

Chop peaches, put into a medium saucepan. Add water and allow to come to a simmer and then reduce heat to low. Peaches will start to break down over the next hour, you can mash them a bit with a potato masher if you like. Add more water if it starts to stick. Stir in honey, lemon and salt and turn off heat. Allow to rest for 20 minutes, serve over some ice cream or as a topping to waffles and pancakes. The kids used it like a jam adding it to crackers and bread.

* Take a knife and score the bottom of the peaches with a small x. Place peaches whole into a pot of boiling water. Remove after 1 minute and place in an ice bath (bowl of water and ice). Take the skin off each peach and slice in half to remove the stone.

Tomato Zen

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(Skip to the end if you have some tomatoes sitting in a bowl waiting to turn into a meal in 10 minutes, then come back and read)

45 pounds, and then some, of tomatoes in the freezer. Ready for sauce, soup, stew or whatever catches my fancy this fall and winter.

There comes a time when I have so much to do I barely know where to start. And that is when I get stuck. Paralyzed. I made a to-do list of all the things that were important, the immediate to the long term. I found it torn up (thank you Lucas) in little pieces all over the living room. Note to self: Keep to-do list away from little ones. It seems funny now, but I'm pretty sure the moment brought me to tears.

The tomatoes were sitting and close to rotting, they didn't care what my to-do list said, it was time to get into the kitchen and blanch, peel, chop, blend and freeze. This is where I found my tomato zen. Thanks to the lovely Liz at Wishing Stone Farm I purchased 45 pounds of saucing tomatoes at a great price, even better if you are a CSA member. Ask your local farmer's if they can set aside tomatoes for you, it will save you money in the fall and winter as your freezer or your pantry is bursting with red!

Each 15 pound box looks like this.

I wash them, line them up to dunk in the hot water and keep the water bath next to the pot to shock the tomatoes after the skin splits.

It takes a minute or two and the skin will split, remove them right after the split.

Get them into the water bath to cool and stop the cooking process, have another bowl to put the peels and cores if removing into.

After you peel the tomatoes, you can freeze as is or remove the core and dice or puree. I made one bag of whole tomatoes for stewing at a later time.

Quartered tomatoes,the cores removed on the bigger tomatoes, otherwise I leave it in.

Labeled and ready to freeze.

I am trying to use as many fresh tomatoes as I can when I get them from a friend's garden or from the markets. We had a great soup the other night with tomatoes, zucchini, carrots, basil, garlic and onion all blended up with some chicken stock. I took a serving out for myself and Lucas and then added cream into the pot for the dairy loving family of mine! Last night I was tired and I grabbed this quick raw sauce out of the fridge, made some rice pasta and it was a meal in a bowl.

Raw Tomato Sauce

5 cups of chopped tomatoes 1 chopped spring onion 1 grated carrot 1 garlic clove 1/2 tsp sea salt pepper to taste fresh basil leaves, about 6 leaves

Combine everything in the blender, I grate the carrots so that you don't end up with little chunks of carrot in the sauce, which just looks slightly strange. Pulse everything until well combined but still a tiny bit chunky. Serve over warm pasta with some chunky Romano cheese on top and fresh basil.

First Came Chloe

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Today we celebrated our eight year old.

She was the first we held, though three little souls passed through my body before her.

She has a light about her that feels so good.

She often wishes for a sister, I tell her that one day she and I will go have a spa get away, girls night out, just the two of us.

She wanted a computer, a puppy and a bird (can't remember what kind) for her birthday.

She got a camera, she's a wonderful photographer.

She came first, this little girl of ours, and here we are at eight.

From My Thoughts About The Connecting Group

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Some of you are curious about the women's groups I lead, and I find it difficult to always explain what goes on, as I think the women I work with do also. From time to time, without any names, or exact situations I will share a little piece of how this work takes place. From my thoughts about the Connecting Groups.

(Artist Chloe, 7 years)

I served them strawberries with chocolate dip (International Chocolate Day) and asked them to think of one thing they loved about themselves. Not all were able to connect to this part of themselves. Some were quite confident in the thing they chose.

I can see into the distance, I can see because I know that this work brings about changes and results. I can see into the distance when they can all go around the room, over and over, allowing the things they love about themselves to be stated matter factly, even joyously.

I can hear it... I love my nose, I love my laugh, I love my attention to detail, I love my belly, I love how I know when my child needs to be hugged or left to deal with something alone, I love that when my husband comes home I can bring a smile to his face by just smiling at him, I love that I can heal people with my hands, I love that I am a great listener, I love that I am aware of when my friends need to talk.... I know this because we are the only ones who control this part of us, this love we have for ourselves, this ability to fall in love with something that has always brought us pain. When we decide to move away from the stories we have lived with for so long, the story that tells us our nose is too big, that we are too short to wear that, the chapters where we learn that anything isn't possible because we aren't good enough.

By writing a new story all of a sudden our nose is kind of cute and we can have a nose ring in it, that outfit does look good on us and we suddenly see that all is possible (and wow, that is so much).

As we dip strawberries into chocolate and laugh about the things women laugh about when in a room together, with chocolate, there is a joy in the air. A feeling that we will get there, we are on the journey, we just have to get past the past.

Tonight I will talk with my other group, TeleConnecting. They won't see that my eyebrows are overgrown and awaiting a waxing, or that I haven't taken a shower or even that my house is a bit on the messy side. You won't tell them. I won't be able to feed them chocolate tonight. We will hear each others voices and stories and connect because that is what women need, that is what we must do to continue to write our amazing stories.

And from time to time dip strawberries, or spoons as the case may be at the moment, into some gorgeous homemade chocolate.

Chocolate Coconut Cream Dip

1 cup coconut milk 1 cup dark chocolate chips 2 T agave nectar 2T coconut oil pinch of salt

Warm the coconut milk in a saucepan over gentle heat. Once steam rises, remove from heat and stir in chips. Whisk until mixed together, add agave and oil and just a pinch of salt. Allow to cool and then refrigerate. Before serving allow to sit at room temperature for about 20 minutes to soften slightly. Can use as a spread, a dip, a spoonful of joy, on a banana, a cracker or anywhere else chocolate is accepted.

What I'm Learning About Me - Part 1

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As time goes on, 36 on the horizon, I am less annoyed by the way I go about life and more amused. I see my habits (oh yes) in my children; aren't children like a little mirror sometimes. I am taking some time to take a look at what I'm learning and hopefully inspire you to do the same. You can find my Good Ole' Raisin and Sunflower Cookies today over here in celebration of chocolate today. Stop in and take a look at Jennifer's site, Savoring The Thyme.

  1. When I have deadlines, meetings, canning, freezing, showering, cleaning, mailing and prepping to do - I go buy paint. ~ When asked in the morning to put his shoes on for school for the eighth time, Eli will be found holding his shoes cutting fabric or sorting through his treasure box.
  2. I really enjoy decaf coffee. ~ I like the taste but more I love the feeling it still brings me of being 19 years old and drinking hot steaming coffee with Patrick in college.
  3. I keep learning the same lessons over and over again. ~ If you have children I don't have to mention as parents we repeat the same things over and over to our kids!
  4. There are certain times when I could go all day without talking if it were possible. That my body just wants to hold it all in, until I am finally ready to let it all out. ~ It does feel good to let it all out.
  5. I must force myself to drink 2 big glasses of water before noon or I don't function well. ~ I just take big, big gulps. And when the kids are hungry again, they are usually thirsty.
  6. I over-react to most things. ~ Enter my children who follow my lead.
  7. Living in the present changes life in that moment, takes me from where I'm not to where I want to be in an instant. ~ I'm only now starting to get really good at this one. It is changing my life.
  8. I love patterns. ~ About 4 years ago I discovered how much I love colorful patterned fabric, the more the better. I love seeing my daughter come upstairs with a mixed matched outfit in outrageous patterns, and napkins, curtains, pillows, notebooks...
  9. My belly is not my worst enemy. ~ How life changing to realize the size of my belly doesn't determine my happiness. I like to see women in all their healthy bodies, the curves and the marks of time, that is so beautiful to me.
  10. Being alone, in my house, is where I find my calm, how I gather myself together, where I collect strength. ~ The centering that comes from the quiet in my space is such joy to me.
  11. I love chocolate. ~ I already knew this one, but now I allow myself to love it, make it and share it with others.

What are you learning about yourself?

More Cake

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This is how to multi-task on your birthday. Whisk your cake, receive birthday calls and become part of a photo shoot. The joy of being two!

This is what coconut flour looks like, very white and fluffy, full of protein and hearty so it fills your belly. You use it in combination with many eggs, 6 in this recipe. I store it in a large jar in the fridge as recipes only call for 1/4 to 1/2 cup.

This is my favorite moment. Before the lasagna comes out of the oven, or the wine is opened. Before the messes start and the salad is dressed. That moment of knowing all the effort and thoughtfulness has deep meaning. That this moment will be inside of you as you wash the dishes and plan the next celebration.

This is the way we like to eat. Garden fresh cucumbers, collards and tomatoes mixed with olives and basil. This is the food we love to share and serve and look at. This is the salad the two year old won't eat yet, but loves to help mix and chop.

This is when you know, at the age of two, that something great is about to happen. That when you blow out each candle, as though you had been doing it your whole life (yes, the two years of it) you are now something new. You are special and loved and important, today and always.

This is the cake after the singing, after the candles, after the wish. Chloe says, "half of that cake was eaten by me." That is why we love homemade, this is why we spend days preparing for our celebrations. I haven't quite mastered this recipe, mine never has that light, airy appearance, but it's a tasty treat. It's the kind of food you can feel good about.

This is the day after the celebration, waking up without the excitement of presents and cake. Starting the day slowly, gently and getting back to the routine of every day. This is the day where presents are unwrapped and can be discovered and enjoyed. This is nice.