I do what you do.
As an avid blog reader I assume that the glimpse, the short paragraph of what I am reading is the sum of that person or their business. If I read a blog about motherhood that is hilarious, I assume that this mother never yells, just spends the day laughing, because she has found the secret to parenting and has a lot of money and a lot of help. And amazing sex. And a personal masseur. And is a size 2 without trying.
Blogs I read that focus only on the positive lead me to create a story that this person has figured it out, cracked the code. Knows the secret to living life and has no struggle. Never has a bad day. Unless they stop for a minute to tell me that they have bad days too. That story among all the positive does more for my soul than any other, because it tells me I'm not alone. Bad days happen. And then what...this is the key. Then what do you do? I try to guide you towards a green smoothie and a conversation rather than a bag of corn chips or glass of wine. Not to believe the bad days go away because of the smoothie. I am so fascinated by the "and then what" of a person's story.
I am torn about this subject of what pieces to share as a writer, coach and mother. As a writer I want to lay it all out, tell my stories, because I know you have them too. As a coach I want to highlight the positive. How to flip it (my favorite thing ever in coaching). As a mother I crave the connection to other mothers and women in a very soulful way. My spirit cannot survive without them.
My most common e-mail is someone writing to thank me for being real. For letting them know I am as human as they are. Patrick often says that from reading my words, a big part of the story is missing. This piece is missing from all of these online businesses because it is not a conversation, it is a moment of reflection, of sharing a piece of the story.We fill in the blanks. Someone's successes can lead us right back to our own failures. Our failures are so rich and dense within the context of another's joy.
We as bloggers and coaches want to inspire. To take a piece of our life and find a way to share it that will help you move through the tough stuff. And offer you ways of connecting further to continue that growth in your life.
Can we let go of creating an idea of others as perfect while our lives are not, all the while knowing deep down that nothing is perfect? Or maybe everything we are learning is perfect because it is ours?
I am a pink flamingo.
A lawn ornament. A recognizable creature that represents a specific niche. A odd but beautiful bird that tucks her head inside of her wings while standing on one foot to conserve heat in her body. A bird that gets her color from her food sources, changing as her food changes. A creature that seems solitary but stays in dense packs.
I have to tell you that for you to know. You wouldn't assume I was a pink flamingo. You make your own assumptions. I make mine of others.
We need each other, our pack. I want to guide you as a pink flamingo, I want you to share this space and your voice of being who you are. I want to share the real and the positive. So in the spirit of letting go-go I am going to let go of all the voices that have been questioning so much lately of how I am choosing to show myself. I'm going to be writer. coach. mom. pink flamingo.
I'm going to follow my instinct, continue to follow the passion that makes me tick, and work my hardest to help you connect back to that most amazing part of you as I am connecting to mine.
Now, you didn't know I've been thinking so much about this that I have been a funked out, blah blob of pink feathers, did you? Of course not. My pink flamingo is now a plastic bird on your lawn. When you think your failures are so blazing because of other's pieces of life, look out and see how silly that bright pink plastic looks in your yard, and then laugh at it. We are all just trying to learn from it. Let's take the inspiration as a piece and apply it to our whole. Let go-go of the rest. Figure out who you are and what/who makes you feel good.
Become part of the conversation. Whatever that looks like for you.
You can enter this one now if you'd like. And share it along if that feels right to you.