Death by Tarot

We kept saying a time would come when we would meet in person. I found myself in her world (city) during the launch of the Biz Circle and after an emotional and lovely trip to see my 97 year old grandfather who is one of the most incredible humans. 

I had thought about doing a meet up and gathering women who lived in the area for a circle and then the reality of time zone changes and the launch and a time when Dave needed my energy to help hold him through some tough challenges in his work all swirled into my highly sensitive body and she said, "How about you come over for tea and tarot."

A sensitive extroverts perfect date.

When you get to meet the women you've worked with only online for years, it is truly a wild experience. You take all your data collected from words and photos and carry it with you until that first hug, that first moment.

Then all the data just washes away and there you are. Real. Touch. Flawed. Perfect.

And then there is tarot. Alix has done readings for many of the women in our circles and to be in person with her, holding the deck, asking the question, I could feel myself opening to the message in a way I'm not always present to.

I am a guide of iterations. I am a wildfire iterator. I am lining up and preparing for what is next.

The first card she put down was death. The spread was so powerful it took my breath away before we even talked about it.

I've felt inside that the work I've done is coming to a close to make way for a something special that has feeling without words, until the permission from this reading to let go. 

Not just that I could let go, but that I must. That it already was.

I've hinted at this being the last time I run my Magic Making Circles. There is no big announcement. It is a feeling. A feeling I am following.
.......

I can see myself 6 months from now and I am observing her. I am watching her inside of new adventures. She has burned down and ashes have always suited her.

I have 6 months to guide women who are inside of businesses and dreams of businesses to do exactly what I'm going to do. Figure it out. Become clear. See their future selves and use that vision as a way of working towards their becomings.

6 months of opening to the messages. I am a half year operator. I see time in 6 month iterations. 
.......

I watched as she placed the cards down and started guiding me through the reading. The lovers grounding me from pelvis to core. The emperor rooting my future self. The promise of not being alone as I move from Death into the boundaries of the she I watch quietly, sitting 6 months from now on her sheepskin, fully in her body and breath, fully in the rise from letting go.