they hadn't seen each other in almost a year and yet it felt like no time had past. groceries bags filled with eggs and veggies and pineapple and the fixings for all sorts of pie. (enchilada and chocolate pretzel.) #lovelanguage
pregnancy cravings all taken care of. plenty of kid food for the gaggle of children. a rough plan for how to spend the three hours before the big kids came home from school. (talk fast. hide the salt and vinegar potato chips.)
we have been visioning and manifesting together for three years.
one year ago we decided to manifest what we desired most as a team. and it went something like this...
a baby. a boyfriend. and a cafe.
we repeated it and dreamed it and visioned it and texted it and prayed for it. for ourselves, for each other.
the cafe arrived first. none of us were prepared for the manifestation of that dream. it may have only belonged to one of us, but we were all instantly grabbed into a swirling vortex of... oh shit, she just got what she asked for. and we watched her go from new mom to new mom with a cafe on an island that asked everything of her. and it felt like there was almost nothing we could do to support her other than believe that this was unfolding exactly as it must.
whoa. and shit. and thank you. and what do we do now?
a few months later he arrived. none of us were prepared for the manifestation of that dream either. it was mine but it became all of ours and my life went from single divorcing mom into learning to be in partnership with 22 years of old patterning and lots of healing to come. (and we are both highly sensitive and just a tad intense.) we have a passion that is unrivaled, it can feel amazing and devastating all in the same week. we are so in love and that love terrifies us, because we don't want to ever be without it again.
we swirled some more... oh shit, and whoa. and thank you. i love him so much.
and then the baby. tucked inside her belly. we are all in love already. getting to this littlest addition in our extended family, as we all know now, getting to this 'what we want' takes work and tears and honesty and pain and all the feelings. all of them. soon she will be crossing over from women to mother. joining us in a world that she has been visioning, calling forth.
um. blessings of spirit whispers. a baby. a boyfriend. and a cafe. one year later. after repeating those words as our secret mantra. we are here. now.
my kids and i don't agree on making wishes. they believe you blow out the candle and keep your wish a secret so it will come true. i believe you blow out the candle and tell as many people to help you conspire as possible.
the baby, the boyfriend and the cafe were wishes that god and the universe and so many people became part of. we never pretended getting what we wanted was easy, especially once we had them.
once we get what we want, in whatever manifestation of it that shows up, that is when the deepening of who we are becoming starts. we never know what that will look like, but the feeling is kind of like...
whoa. and oh, shit... and thank you... and what now... and i am so in love.
enchilada pie became dinner. wine started pouring at lunch and ended far into the night. the one with the baby started visioning around midnight while the ones drinking wine watched. finally we joined in.
because once you have the baby, the boyfriend and the cafe, you better start dreaming together again.
the floor of the loft was covered in bits and pieces of magazines and secret messages and the salt and vinegar potato chips were no more. at 2am we climbed into bed, exhausted.
they came to the loft that day because they hadn't seen each other in almost a year. they came because it was time to realize the power of what we had created. and to feel it. and to talk about what had happened to us since our visions became reality. to talk about the pain and truths inside of getting what you want, because it comes with the huge price of change. and how we lose some things when other things arrive. and how witnessing each other inside the pain and darkness of the dream was brutal. and pure love. and what now... and i love you... and pretzel pie... and love languages... and thank you.