We start: February 1st, 3 emails a week Where: Virtual, wherever you are. How long: 5 weeks. Why: So we can take a deeper breath inside of our lives after the exhale. So we can say yes to that open space.
Surrender: To give yourself up to a new emotion or course or influence. To melt into and open up to...
I was remembering a story about my boys from two years ago. One morning Eli (then 7) asks Lucas (then 4) who he loves more, himself or mama? Lucas being four and his world wrapped around his mother says, "Mama."
Eli then goes into a speech about how you have to love yourself the most. If you love yourself the most then you can love other people. He made a good case to the little one on why loving himself was the first step to mama love. The four year old just glazed over and I teared up.
This child is my little spirit guide in matters of the heart and spirit. He is so much like me. And we both struggle with explosive feelings and deep desires for surrender inside of the struggle that we tend to create for ourselves.
The other night as he was doing his homework he throws down his pencil and whines at me, "Mooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaam. I just can't finish my homework until I organize my chi." And then he asks to meditate. He has grown up watching Avatar and Korra as his source of spirituality and they haven't let us down.
I surrendered and lit the candle and put on the music and watched as his body calmed down inside of his own surrender. I have been feeling like such an unfocused, trying to be all things for everyone mom right now, my chi is pretty unorganized.
This is where we can make space for allowing, releasing and simply being in our now.
Each time I look at my calendar and think about what program I'd like to run there is always a direct connection to where I am. Over the last two years I've worked on creating a ritual, a practice of moving into surrender. And right now I am needing it again. I need to go into my practice, as I will again and again.
We aren't perfect, flawless. We are change. We are beginning and iterating and choosing often at a pace so rapid our nervous systems can't keep up.
Surrender is the slow down. The space. The in between. The forgiveness. The prayer.
Surrender is the intersection between acceptance and change.
As we find ourselves pushing against and fighting what we are feeling, we draw in more of that which we push. We continue to obsess, replay, hear the mind chatter that keeps us stuck. That old story plays over and over and over. We become trapped.
There is an ease when we learn how to embrace surrender. Feeling without fight. Fear and struggle are met with truth and grace. Releasing and allowing feel spectacular with the flow from stuck into surrender. Surrender is an entry point for joy. Surrender can guide you into stillness, moving, creating, acting and flowing.
Surrender is no longer pushing against :: My belly (insert body part of choice or flaw of choice) is so flabby I could never be loved (love myself).
Surrender is no longer playing the same old story :: I have nothing unique to offer the world because I'm not creative, smart, worldly, skinny, beautiful...
Surrender is no longer living in the what-if :: What if I could lose these last 10 pounds, be a size 4, make more money, get my partner to understand, have more time...
Surrender is melting into, opening up, releasing and that moment when you are ready to forgive yourself.
i fell apart last night. one dash pms. one dash sickness. one dash feeling lonely while being sick. one dash entering into a huge unknown.
in a few months i will be stepping into my new life. a life that manifested from a story i long to tell. soon.
i haven't been praying in the morning. my warm coffee in hand, my quiet prayer for the day. lost inside the chaos of school vacation and holiday plans and a sickness that keeps swirling around my family.
prayer is my love note. prayer is how i stop feeling sorry for myself. prayer is a gift to the vibration of the day. prayer is vulnerable. prayer is surrender.
holding so tight to fears. so last night he says it is time to talk about it. and we did. and i cried. and fell apart. i still don't know how to talk when i am in fear. i am still afraid that i will trigger a fight or anger.
i am learning to talk. to feel safe inside the fear. but shit, it is so so hard.
prayer is my love note. safety is my prayer.
there is so much to surrender and i continue to hold on too tight and this body of mine can't breathe.
as we are journeying together into this new life we are in the space between. i am learning to surrender my need to be right. i am learning to surrender the fear of anger. i am learning to surrender to having to do it all alone.
i am learning to let go of always feeling like i am failing.
prayer as love note. knowing each other, learning, being vulnerable in the asking. sometimes it is the fear of the answers. i want to surrender into deep connection. a connection i have never known before until now.
after 13 years of parenting, 8 years of running a business, 1 1/2 years into a divorce and living on my own for the first time ever, 9 months into a new love relationship and 41 years in my body; surrender is showing up more than ever.
every time I think I 'get' it, a new lesson arrives. what brings me softness is the practice of surrender that we work with inside of this circle brings me back to my truth.
i seek surrender in new ways. inside of love. inside of deep deep truths i am holding inside.
"Hannah's program taught me how to shift my judgements into truths. Practicing this skill has profoundly shifted my thinking, reduced anxiety, and helped me experience greater joy in my everyday life. I highly recommend this program to anyone who is ready to surrender all the messy details of what's holding you back and start walking in the purity of truth." ~ Britta Alexander
Imagine your life if you could move past the stories that hold you in fear and excuses?
Imagine your relationships, your business, your spirit?
Where in your world is there an echo of surrender and what feelings does it leave you with?
Most of us are afraid to shine. We let our fear overtake us so we can’t move forward. We are paralyzed with shame, with trying to seem perfect and doing what is expected rather than what brings us joy.
We have a beautiful truth that wants to be heard. It is clogged by indecision, perfectionism, fear and doubts.
Are you ready to surrender to the struggle?
Would you like to allow and let-go without feeling like you are constantly pushing against and rather start to flow with?
Are you willing to allow grace (love, ease, fluidity, forgiveness, kindness) into that space?
We will release. We will move into our light. It won't be easy but it will bring us closer to the ease we desire each day when we wake.
- We will work with a weekly theme of moving from the story that is keeping us stuck and locked into fear and into writing our new one.
- Three emails from me each week to support your journey for each of the 5 weeks.
- Prompts with soulwork to take at your own pace
- Videos from me sharing my stories of surrender.
- A FB group where we will come together and share our journey and deepen our support, which will actively help to prompt you deeper into your knowing.
- Gentle power, that is how we will enter into surrender, gentle power.