When I made my 2012 vision board on the February New Moon this picture of the woman in a gray sequined tunic with a black jacket standing under my word for the year, magic, was my focus. The essence of this picture, a woman standing in her power, shining, stepping into the light was the image I was manifesting. I also was learning that comfort as an HSP while feeling like I could claim my own style were not exclusive. I wanted this jacket and this sequined top, they just had to feel right on my body.
As a highly sensitive person much of my getting dressed is like a kid who can't stand the feeling of the hem on their sock. My clothes must feel right or they stay in the closet, unworn, often with tags still on.
I found my sequin top at TJ Maxx I think. I had been searching for one where you couldn't feel the sequins and that was long enough to act as a tunic. I love this shirt. It is gray, one of the 5 colors I wear. It sparkles. When I wear it I feel magic. Style to me is about a feeling. How do you want to feel when you climb into your clothes? As an HSP, comfort is at the top of that list, but it is more than comfort. To me it is like the difference between feeling like you are too hot or too cold, it is like stepping into that perfect temperature.
This year I've been quietly shopping in a new way. I love handmade items from Etsy. I love materials that are so soft you barely feel them. I am spending more for one item because I don't wear many items. I've also been releasing things. Releasing all the jeans that don't fit. Releasing anything that is a color I won't wear even if it is gorgeous. If I won't wear it, why is it hanging in my closet?
This also means releasing stories of guilt around spending money on so many things that I don't use. This is the hardest thing to release, each time I fill a bag with donation I remind myself that I am just getting to know myself even deeper. That this release is about coming home, but usually the guilt tries hard to stop me and keep the piles of unworn clothes in the drawer.
I found three essential things for my day as a mama and work at home entrepreneur: jeans, leggings and yoga pants. All three of these things can go from a snuggle on the couch to a tea date with a friend to walking the dog or sitting on the computer writing. I tried every jean and then I finally found the them. The ones. They feel like butter, the stretch just enough and my belly fits them. Love.
Layers have always been key to my HSP. Often the layers act as a shield when I'm in the world or feeling vulnerable. A scarf seems to balance me, ground me and once I discovered infinity scarves I was in my joy. Infinity scarves mean no tying or falling off or having to readjust. You just loop it on and go. More love.
In college I wore a lot of jewelry, in layers. Jewelery again must be soft, no itching and I try to find stones and metals that work with my energy. Just like the layers, they seem to ground me, to root my energy. A bonus is that many artists on Etsy are aware of this and help you choose your stones and colors through the descriptions they write.
Not long ago I realized that I only feel like myself if I wear certain colors. Neutrals really, whites, mochas or gold, gray and black or navy occasionally. I would buy gorgeous tops that sparkled of jewel tones and they would sit in my closet or I would wear them for 2 hours and then run back and grab my mocha shirt.
I remember once buying this beautiful purple tunic. Even as I was standing in line I could hear this little voice that had yet been fully acknowledged saying, you won't wear this, you won't wear this. I tried a few times to put it on and never made it out of the house. It was a little itchy and well, purple!!!
The moment I take off the shirt that feels wrong and climb inside of 'my colors' I can feel my body relax, melt. Perhaps some of my OCD is mixed into this, I don't know why this is, yet now when you look in my closet, you will not see the rainbow, you'll see the sand, the seashells, the clouds. You see me.
You will also see the birds. Feather earrings and my sparrow tattoo are part of this HSP style. They feel like me. This is what Highly Sensitive Style is, creating a wardrobe that feels like you, clothes that you climb into and come alive in your own version of shining. Clothes that not only make you look beautiful but that help you to feel beautiful. The gorgeous life, wearing things that make us more us.
As I create my vision board in 2013 I will find an image that captures the essence of the woman I continue to grow into. I love letting her find her light and giving her the gift of knowing who she is, in style, thoughts and visions.
Here is a list of style that I love, most I own, some I just adore.
This was the shirt that started it all. I love oversized shirts that hide my belly and I've always adored off the shoulder slouchy style. I'm sort of still in the 90's I think, jean jackets and off the shoulder shirts. Bring it!
Loving this, look at that color...that is my color. My HSP also really likes sleeves that are loose and then fitted at the bottom. I love being able to place the sleeve where I want it and it stays there!
I found this shirt and the color was whispering to me, come lay in the sand, take off your shoes and let's play.
Finally I found jeans that I feel joyful in. They don't feel like leggings, let's be real, but they are buttery and stretchy and I love them. I spent way more than this on the numerous jeans that I never wear because they don't feel good on me. I'm so happy to be done with that.
All I can say is that this jacket is my favorite thing. It is soft, feels almost like a sweater and looks so beautiful on. My daughter tries to steal it daily, she may need one for Christmas!
I find all my yoga pants at TJ Maxx and usually I get Green Apple. They are long enough for my long legs, the material is gorgeous and I feel really sexy in them. Yes, sexy in yoga pants. This is a priority of mine.
I adore boots with heels and again, spent lots of money on shoes that don't feel good. I can walk the dog in these, stand in them for hours and they are heaven.
My feather earrings are no longer for sale but browsing through Etsy you'll find gorgeous feathers, like these.
Natural elements and animal energy has become vital for me, I adore this.
My favorite infinity scarf with shimmer is no longer for sale, I'd buy 12 of them if it was. I found something like it but I've never touched this one so don't know how it feels.
A stretchy and chunky belt is my new favorite thing. It helps me create some shape and not feel so self conscious about those things they call 'love handles!' I don't have this one but a similar one.
What I most want you to know is that finding your style is about the inner and outer expression of you. It is the telling of your story through the image you put on and bring to the world. Your style is a blend of your visions, feelings and comforts.
Feel gorgeous, be gorgeous.
More musings on HSP...