Lucas, who is almost three, had 7 tantrums (melt downs really) the other day. I am learning to stay calm, focus on my breath, and just clean something when he falls apart. I can't comfort him or it gets worse. We are slowly discovering his highly sensitive places and moments and going slowly with him. Potty training was the last thing on our mind because just getting him to get dressed is so much time and effort. Then he just decided to do it himself. And he did.
The other day I was in tears. It is hard to be on the other end of a melt down that just doesn't make sense. I don't mind going out with him on walks where he wears no shoes, or shirt and can only handle one pair of cut up jammie pants which he's had on for four days. The 80 year old Irish woman doesn't like it, but I can handle her, not the tantrums. So we are on a journey to learn more and discover his needs.
I believe in sharing with you pieces of my real days. It is so easy to look through a window of someone's web world and feel that you see all of them. So many women that I coach develop a sense of not good enough because of what they perceive is another's world. My living room is half painted, my dog pooped all over the floor today and none of my kids ate their dinner. I put carrots in the meatballs, bad move.
The whole idea behind The Joy UP was to look at how we could bring more joy in, despite the tantrums and dog poop, or maybe because of it. We looked at using small daily rituals and shifting thoughts as a way to allow joy to enter our lives.
During these last few days we had tantrums. And my kids fought. We went to the beach. I half painted my living room. We picked lots of cherry tomatoes. I cried as I read messages from women in The Joy UP, it was that special. I kept breathing. I stayed up eating chips and salsa with Chloe until 11pm (night owls). I ran Lucas into a public bathroom when he informed me he had poop-ted, no diapers remember! I kissed my puppy a lot. I forgot a Dr. visit for the second time. I got overwhelmed when I had to call another Dr. office and ask for copies of my kids vaccination/or not so vaccination records. Yes, I can lead 200 plus women through 10 days of joy, but calling an office and getting to the mail, that overwhelms me! I thought about where I want to go next in my parenting, my work, my creative efforts. There were more tantrums.
And so much joy.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
(If you missed The Joy UP, it will be available soon, so keep your eyes out!)