I was cleaning out my fridge the other day (great activity in the heat) and there was this sticky, gunky goo under one of the drawers. I took my sponge and started to scrub it, used my nail to try to scrape it and let it sit in some natural cleaner. Nothing was working, it seemed as though the goo was gaining strength under my attempts to break it down. Also during my fridge clean out, I need to mention that I was really crabby. Crabby or frustrated for me means cleaning in a frantic rampage all around the house.
So crabby mama was fighting this goo, goo was not yielding and I became distracted for a moment. I started rubbing the spot of gunk in a gentle way, as I was trying to talk to one of my kids. I noticed that the goo was starting to break up and disappear under the sponge. I tried it on another spot, magic, goo be gone! There was a lot of goo, and the gentleness method was removing it.
I thought about the goo in the next few days, and how we so easily try to fight against what is in our way. In the fight, resistance builds and that which we are fighting gains strength and momentum. If we are moving through some of our fears, focusing on the fear only brings more resistance. We want to take a risk, a chance, but the fear is too great. The focus becomes the fear and why we have never succeeded and always failed. The fear is fought with self defeating language and builds resistance becoming stronger, more alive, full of power. What if we approach instead with kindness, a gentleness that we might approach a friend dealing with a similar situation. If we take a moment to understand the fear, ask it why it has helped us in the past and appreciate how it's helped, but that today it will be released and forgiven.
Today I will do one thing, take one action, with gentleness and purpose.
Stepping out of my comfort zone and planning new projects brings joy to my world, yet at some point along the way I find all the reasons why I'm not quite good enough for it. (FEAR) When one of my kids get sick, it can spiral me into disaster. First, no sleep, then the whining (the kids whine too!) and I start fighting against what can't be done. I put on my boxing gloves and give the exhaustion and lack of space a great fight. One punch, "I can't get anything done, no one is sleeping and the house is a mess." Second punch, "Look at all the things that aren't working around here. I'm all alone in this." Third punch, "I give up, I'm just not cut out for this. I have been trying so hard to stay positive and keep my house clean, for what?"
You see the fight? In that fight so much resistance is being built up. Yet, a gift lies within those fights. You see where you need to be gentler to your own "goo." Part of that goo is the fight. When I acknowledge my exhaustion and need for space as normal for me, usually with a laugh from Patrick, after having flung all of those self insults around, I am softened to the process. It doesn't mean I won't fight again next time, just that a new understanding, a softness for my getting through the tough stuff starts to become part of that process.
I want to invite you to look at your goo? Where could you find some gentleness for it? What is the importance of that goo in your life?
As you start to think about this part of your process I am excited to offer you a FREE tele-class in early August to help guide you along. I'm going to be giving you some tips to bring your life and health to the next level, and we'll have some live give-aways on the call. It is going to be fun and purposeful and you are going to want to be there. I'll have details soon, so stay in touch.